Musings

A crown of flowers

October 26, 2022 J. 0 Comments


Imagine if rather than snakes, 
Medusa had flowers in her hair. 
Now wouldn’t that be something?

Juicy Raindrops! ♡


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Story

A measure of affection

October 24, 2022 J. 0 Comments


The first time he told me he loved 
I laughed.
He couldn’t be serious.
We had met just a short while ago
We didn’t know each other enough
It was way too fast
How could it be real?

I was 21
I believed that for love to be real and true
He had to know my favourite colour
How many siblings I had
Or at least where my hometown was
So I rejected his affections
So we could know each other more
Now that I think about it
that was when the twinge began.

I watched him wait
I watched him give up
That twinge grew into an ache
I couldn’t understand it
I had made this decision 
And I knew it was the right one
So why was I feeling this way?

It would take a handful of years
When I was much older and a little wiser
For me to consider that maybe I had it wrong after all
What did the duration of time matter in the grand scheme of things?
What did my favourite colour have to do with who I was?
What did knowing the size of my family or the land my ancestors came from 
have to do with the depth or truth of our relationship? 
Where did I even get these parameters from?
How did I learn to use them as a way of measuring affection?

He knows my faith, he knows how to make me laugh 
and he sits with me in favourite spot everyday. 
Aren’t those things better and more important 
than my love for mostly pink but sometimes red?

I don’t know yet truly. I don't have the big answer.
I’m just writing these thoughts down as I have them..

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Juicy Raindrops! ♡

Inspired by a conversation with Ahsia.

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Night,

Jasmine of Diana

October 22, 2022 J. 0 Comments


I am the daughter of the moon
Jasmine of Diana 
Birth’d of sea foam and pollen 
carried on the tail wind of Boreas of the North.

I was created a wee thing
Amorphous; soft and vulnerable.
Like a sponge i absorbed all i came across.
Light, love, air and darkness.

While the light filled me, the darkness seduced me
So I wrapped my soul around them both and created a cocoon.
I found form in my chrysalis
And burst forth as Serenity. 


Juicy Raindrops! ♡
070920

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Night,

Items in mirrors are closer than they appear.

October 20, 2022 J. 0 Comments


Looking at the past through the rear view mirror
It’s been a decade
I have written all the goodbyes and all the fare-the-wells
But my heartstrings have refused to get the memo
They still wrap around the ghost of you 
Even the shadow of you is long gone
And yet
Yet
The truth is 
Items in mirrors are closer than they appear

Juicy Raindrops! ♡
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Day,

about truth

October 17, 2022 J. 0 Comments


Ethics may change,
Clans, seasons and beliefs will change too.
People will change, and their moral codes with them

But truth, truth will remain the same
A shiny sparkling pearl 
No matter how deep it is buried and how much mud is thrown at it.

0633 220622
Juicy Raindrops! ♡

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Musings

For as long as you love me

October 16, 2022 J. 0 Comments


You wasted so much time worrying about him
About the times he would call and the way he would look at me.
You worried that we were friends and that he would sway my heart away from you.

You didn’t understand that while you loved me, 
No one could take me away from you.
While you loved me, I was yours. 
And as long as you loved me, that remained true. 

Juicy Raindrops! ♡
0205 271221

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Four

Four

October 15, 2022 J. 0 Comments


As he died and flashed back on this life, he thought
“I no longer remember what I worked so hard for.”

And as i watched him bleed out
This fierce, misguided and somewhat evil man
I realised that i didn’t want that to be my last thought in this life
For whatever i had lived my life for to be revealed as worthless 
as my soul leaves my body and returns to the earth
as my final breaths begin to count down to the last.

Maybe this is all the Four’s* typical search for meaning again 
But it is still my truth.

0457 270622 
 Juicy Raindrops! ♡

*Type 4 Enneagram

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Musings

What a thought!

October 14, 2022 J. 0 Comments


Here’s a grating thought 
An outrageous, heartbreaking and humbling thought.

All our history, our music, our chemistry.
All the twos and sevens 
All the guiding stars, wandering hands and malteasers
All the poetry
All the songs
All the Something Bigs

All those moments that seemed like the weaving of our tale
The building of our universe
The starting chapters of our lives
Chronicling the way we met
The way it changed
The way it grew
The way we learned
Our struggles, longing and undeniable attraction
How our souls seemed to exist on the same plane
How our waltz was sung by nature herself
That red thread connecting us forevermore 
We were one destiny that I believed in
One I would have laid my sword down before.

Yet.

All that we were
All that we could have been
The entirety of us
is simply a footnote in two separate biographies.

A grating, outrageous, heartbreaking and humbling thought indeed.

Juicy Raindrops! ♡
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Experiences,

Despite you, without condition

October 12, 2022 J. 0 Comments


I don’t mind making you feel good 
Or wiping your tears,
They hurt me almost as much as they hurt you
I wanted to absorb them from you 
To take my share of happiness and give it up in exchange for your sorrows.

I didn’t mind being there for you
Defending you 
Even apologising for you 
I never minded.

Even when it got really hard
Even when you didn’t make it easy 
Even when you lashed out at me 
Even when I got hurt and frustrated 
Even when you never acknowledged it 
Or me.

I tried to walk away but my legs wouldn’t move
Due to a small fact I realised long ago
Today I immortalise the words by
releasing them into the cosmos and giving them (more) power: 

Mother Dearest, I love you.
Despite you. 
Without condition. 

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Juicy Raindrops! ♡

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