curious much?!
No, I'm not mad at you.i'm just scared that i have feelings for you.. or will develop them if we go on this way. and that just cant be. i care too much about you for that. perhaps i'm being a bit selfish. no, i believe the word is self-preserving. Rado my love, we wouldn't last three days out there. we have a good thing going now, if we tried to change it there would be dire consequences. consequences we might not recover from. changing the rules right at this moment would be suicidal, for me anyway. i've been single 6months now, coming from a 5year roller-coaster relationship.
right now i believe we're more in curiosity than in love. the flame dies out, curiosity gets satisfied, then what? i guess we've got friendship but i doubt we will have even that if we continue down this path. i dont have many friends. acquaintances and contacts, yes. but friends, no. do you see where i'm headed?
i've been called perverse (by you) countless times and perhaps you're right. and i wont say i'm doing this for you. i'm not self-sacrificing either. i just dont know whats right for us and until i do, limited contact seems best.
